"How To Win In Marriage" Discussion Questions

Connect

Share about an experience you’ve had where someone stood up for you, and how it helped you.

Talk It In

I. Read Hebrews 13:4

1. What is one way you have honored marriage well in your life, and what is one way you have struggled to honor it?
2. How can you give honor to marriage if you’re not married?

II. Read Proverbs 18:22 and Mark 10:6–9

1. When you think about your own marriage (or future marriage), what do you value about God’s design?
2. How do you feel most challenged by it?

Talk About It

1. Where do you feel a strong sense of oneness in your marriage right now? Where do you sense some disconnection?
2. Which “wall-builder” from the message hit closest to home for you (selfishness, contempt, emotional withdrawal, bitterness, busyness, disappointment, secrets, sex deficit, resentment, disrespect, broken trust… or something else)?
3. What is one brick of that wall you need God’s help to tear down this week, and one practical step you can take to begin removing it?

III. Read Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 & Galatians 6:2

1. What kind of support helps you feel most loved: encouragement, belief, affection, shared time, someone having your back, or something else?
2. What is one way you will intentionally support your spouse (or close friendships) this week so they feel “better off because you’re together?”

IV. Read Ecclesiastes 4:11

1. How would you rate your current reality of satisfying each other—generally?
2. Where do you feel warmth in your marriage and where do you feel “cold?”
3. What is one need (emotional, spiritual, practical, or physical) you need to express more clearly to your spouse?

V. Read Ecclesiastes 4:12

1. In what ways have you been fighting against each other instead of standing with each other back-to-back?

VI. Read Ecclesiastes 6:11

1. What do you sense the real spiritual attack has been against your marriage lately, and how will you respond differently now?

Talk It Home

VII. Read Ephesians 4:2–3

1. How will you choose to meet one of your spouse’s needs this week in a way that “keeps them warm” emotionally or relationally? (See 1 Corinthians 7:3 for reference.)
2. What is one relational habit you want to change or adopt to protect unity—tone, patience, words, listening, humility, empathy?
3. What is one “right fight” you need to step into this week: forgiving, covering, shifting your tone, praying for your spouse?

Prayer Time